JLE#33: Week 9 Story Hook
Week 9 Story: Hook
Adam is an incredibly sound hunter. He is of royal blood and is in the process of
grooming so when the day comes, he will do so eloquently. He carries with him a bow and a quiver of
immaculate arrows that appear transparent and weightless. His bow has an enchantment with abilities
that enable the wielder to achieve amazing success in the art of hunting
animals. However, the bow’s ability is
only available to those who are worthy of the bow’s powers. The bow will determine if its wielder is
worthy for the power because it is connected to all hunting grounds. All lifeforms in the forests are a part of
the bow and it behaves as if it has a mind of its own—capable of calculating
the most lethal and precise shots.
Adam’s brother Mat is not of royal blood and is an adopted
child found by his parents as an infant.
Mat is a fisherman and always feels like he and the oceans are one. Mat frequently goes far out to sea so he is
alone and may cherish its vastness. Mat
has with him a golden-lace net that he uses to reel in fish and other marine
life that can be consumed for nourishment.
This net, like Adam’s bow, is a part of bodies of water. The net will deem the wielder of the net
worthy for its use and if it did not, nothing would be caught. The two brothers are prodigies in their
chosen fields and Adam seeks competition and seeks a challenge. He told Mat, “I am dreading hunting in these
chosen forests where my arrow will always find the heart of my target.” Adam proposes to Mat that perhaps they can
switch utilities and see who is the worthiest.
Mat agrees and takes the bow and quiver of arrows from Adam and sets out
on a journey to the forests.
Mat successfully hunting in the forests enrages Adam so much
he tosses the net into the ocean, never to see the surface again. Several days pass and Mat is just as
successful and a natural hunter worthy of using Adam’s bow. He returns to Adam by the docks only to find
Adam possessing no fish. Not only did
Adam not have any fish, but Mat’s net is missing as well. Adam has an ego and thinks himself above the
connection Mat has with the oceans and is upset because he is not catching any
fish. Mat uncovers he is the worthiest
to rule and is to wield both the net and bow because the bow gives Mat a vision
and shows him the truth. It also
foreshadows how Adam will act as a king and it is unacceptable. The bow tells Mat he must kill Adam and
prevent from being king. Adam intercepts
this information because of the faint amount of his connection to it and is jealous
of Mat. However, Adam does not know the
bows instructions for Mat to kill him.
Adam banishes him from the kingdom and Mat obeys because he does not
want to start a conflict and feels the time is not right.
Years pass and Adam is now a day away from being sworn in as
king. Mat confronts Adam and realizes he
is not the same person he remembers. He is
worn and evil, his eyes bloodshot and his face looks weary and dark despite his
las bit of youth remaining. Mat remembers
his duty to the bow and overarchingly, to the kingdom. Mat grabs the bow from Adam’s armory and brings
it to Adam and tells him he should wield it for his inauguration. Adam thinks it is a good idea and motions for
mat to come closer. Mat draws an arrow
and compliments Adam on how well kempt he keeps his equipment. Mat proceeds to knock the arrow and draw back
the bow and then aims it directly at Adam.
Before Adam even says a word, Mat releases the tension and the arrow
pierces through Adam’s chest. The bow’s
enchantment keeps the altercation quiet so no one in the surrounding quarters senses
Adam’s death. Mat takes the bow and swiftly leaves his old brother’s quarters
and the kingdom.
*seagulls cry overhead*
Mat wakes up in his boat rocking in open water. He must have fell asleep after setting traps
for crab and took a nap. He looks back
to shore to see his brother Adam waving for him to come back to the docks.
Mat dreamt the entire story, but even though it was over he
could still hear a faint calling from the shore…the bow called for him.
Author's Note: I decided to stay in line with the plot for
most of the story. I ended up deciding to take out the romance by not including
a princess at all in my rendition of this story. I also took out the fact that
the two brothers were not actually biological brothers in this story. By doing
so, I hope the reader could understand that they were very close growing up and
later in life because of the fact Mat was an adopted sibling. I kept the bow
and arrows from the original story and decided to replace the fishhook with a
fishing net. As I was writing I got an idea which led to the abrupt end to my
story. It was weird because I had originally intended for the two brothers to
be able to rekindle their relationship. I also wanted it to be a short story
and thought that envy, jealousy, or even power would be the demise of Adam and
Mat’s relationship. To some degree it
was, but My addition of the dream at the end kind of takes away from it all and
makes it sort of interesting. I could
not decide on an ending so I am kind of keeping this story in mind for an
alternate ending.
Story Source: Romance of Old Japan, Part I: Mythology and
Legend by E. W. Champney and F. Champney (1917).
Story - Fortunate Fish-hook
Howdy!
ReplyDeleteIs there a particular reason that the men had these enchanted items? Where they heirlooms? Or something the boys found when they were children? It is always fun to see different stories of future rulers who have gained an evil glint to their eye. I am sure Mat felt the burden of his decision, having to shoot his own brother to protect the people of the kingdom. Did Mat ever end up finding his net, or did he just stick with the bow? Overall, great job and I like the characterization of the two brothers!
I liked your story. It had a distinct beginning, middle, and end. I could wonder about the origins of the magical bow and net, but I think I'll just enjoy a story that starts and ends. Why was Adam worthy of the bow and not the net, though? That's one thing I could wonder. Was it because he was trying to catch the fish out of competition instead of for food? That's a good thought. Good job, dude!
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